Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Five Food Facts

Okay, these aren't really food facts, they're really just facts about me and food.  Some of my quirks.  Because why not end NaBloPoMo with something completely random?

1)  I don't prepare food on directly on the counter.  Ever.  I know some people who make sandwiches or butter toast without a plate.  I am not those people.

2)  I rarely eat directly from the container.  (The obvious exception being single serving containers.)  I put my chips on a plate; I put my ice cream in a bowl; I even eat goldfish crackers out of a little dish.

3) I don't serve from pots and pans at the table.  Either things get dished to plates in the kitchen, or everything gets put in serving dishes and put on the table.  I just don't like the way pots and pans on the table looks.

4) I always, ALWAYS grate my own cheese.  Pre-grated cheese is a) more expensive and b) gross.  Plus it doesn't melt right.  (Okay, pre-grated mozzarella is alright.  But never cheddar!)

5)  I rarely buy pre-made cookie dough because I think cookies from scratch are SO much better, but I almost always use box mixes for cakes and brownies.  I guess I'm just to lazy to make those from scratch?

Any random food facts you want to share?

Monday, November 29, 2010

Adjective of the day

These days Kalena seems to know one adjective: green.  Green is used not only to describe all colors, but pretty much to describe EVERYTHING.  Green show = any show she might like.  Green shirt = clean shirt (also, any shirt other than the one I've just offered her.)  Green room = other room.  It's pretty awsome.  Conversations go like this:

Me: Where is daddy?  Here?
Kalena: No.  Green room!

Me: Do you want to wear this shirt?
Kalena: No, GREEN shirt!

Me: Which plate do you want for dinner?
Kalena: Green plate!
Doesn't matter that I've offered her a choice between the purple plate and the orange plate.

And yes, she is always very enthusiastic about the green.  I know she'll outgrow it soon enough, but it's fun right now.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Random Thankful

Since I didn't do a "thankful" post on Thanksgiving, I thought I'd tell you something I'm thankful for today.  Kalena doesn't climb out of her crib.  I'm sure she COULD.  Especially since she's climbed INTO it on numerous occasions.  It is SO GREAT to be able to put her in her crib and know that she'll stay there.  She may get up at the crack of dawn, but at least she doesn't get up at the crack of dawn and then break her head open getting out of her crib without help.  Sometimes it's the little things.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Looks like an enthralling book

Lately Kalena likes to tell me, "No, Miss read it!" when I try to read to her.  Usually I end up letting her "read" one book while I read her a different one.  


Other times I just take pictures.  

P.S.  She still wears her zip up the back pjs to sleep in, but sometimes she asks to put on those footie pjs with the hearts when she wakes up.  Wouldn't you want to run around in pink fleece footie pajamas if you had some?

Friday, November 26, 2010

Black Friday shopping-- do you?

I went Black Friday shopping this morning, for the first time in several years.  I went with my mom and my sister, and we were feeling ambitious, but not insane, so I picked them up at 5 am.  We went to the mall (that's where our Target is) and people, I have NEVER seen the mall so busy.  Never, and I've shopped there on Christmas eve.  We had a good time, and got what we wanted so I consider the day a success.

Here are the highlights:

Kalena waking me up at midnight.  Of course she would wake up randomly on the one night I *really* need the sleep.  Why?  Well, when I asked her what she needed she told me, "My dinosaurs! My dinosaurs!" through her sobbing.  I handed them over and she went right back to sleep.

People ordering Chinese food at the mall food court at 5:15 am.  Really, that's your breakfast choice?  Also, really?  You're going to get yourself to the mall before 5 am to get all the best deals and then spend your time eating breakfast in the food court?

The line in Target that wrapped all the way around the store.  Yep, we spent more time waiting in line than we did shopping.

What were the highlights of your Black Friday?

Thursday, November 25, 2010

This post is not at all related to Thanksgiving

Remember when I told you that I had my annual Thanksgiving week cold?  Well, Kalena got it this year too.  It hasn't dampened her spirits much, but she has developed a bit of a cough.  In fact, enough of a cough that she woke up a couple nights ago coughing so hard it was making her gag.

This is where I take a little detour and tell you that when we first moved into the house we all got a stomach bug.  Like, literally the first night we spent here Kalena threw up all night.  Over and over and over.  (Why do people carpet bathrooms?  WHY?)  She was good about recognizing the feeling and when she was about to throw up she would tell us she needed to "'pit a-potty" or spit in the potty if you can't translate.  It was a miserable few days and I hope we never have to do it again.  Or, since that may be too much to ask, I hope that next time I'm not sick at the same time as both the kids on a day Brian is out of town.  AWFUL.

Back to the story at hand.  When she woke up the other night coughing we got her out of bed and Brian watched some cartoons with her while I ran to the store to find anything age-appropriate to give her.  But while she waited, anytime she started coughing hard she would tell Brian that she needed to "'pit a-potty" because she recognized that gagging feeling.  She didn't ever throw up (thankfully) but it made me feel bad that the stomach bug made such an impression on her.  What two year old recognizing gagging WEEKS after being sick?  Apparently throwing up approximately one million times is memorable, even at two.  

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Well, you all know how I feel about eBay

I bought Will some clothes on eBay the other day.  When I realized I was leaving him in pajamas all day because he had more pairs of pjs than actual outfits I figured I'd better do something about that.  So off to eBay, won an auction, waited on the clothes and then had to laugh out loud at one of the onesies when they arrived.  You see, the auction only had one picture, so while I could tell there was a picture of some sort on one of the onesies, I couldn't tell what it was.  Turns out it was this:


Or, a closer view:


And I had to laugh because Will missed being a Sagittarius by one day.  ONE.  Who sells personalized stuff like that on eBay without saying what it is?  It's not going to stop me from putting him in it though (obviously, he wore it today.)  If Kirsta's baby gets here early (she's due Dec 22nd) then this little outfit will get passed on to someone who actually IS a Sagittarius.  Otherwise it may just end up in the goodwill box.  After Will outgrows it of course.  Waste not, want not, right? 

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Want some motivation to clean?

Kirsta wanted to watch some Hoarders, and since it's streaming on Netflix, that's what we're doing.  Man oh man, there is NOTHING that makes me want to clean like watching this show.  Seriously, when I'm sorting stuff and I start to think things like, "maybe I'll need this someday" I remind myself that that is exactly the kind of crap people on Hoarders say.  That's all the motivation I need.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Well, we braved the dinosaurs today

Apparently, even though he was scared to death while he was there, Patrick hasn't stopped talking about the "dinosaur zoo" since the last time we went.  So today Eric, Joe, and I took Espen, Patrick, and Kalena off to Dinosaur Journey while Kirsta stayed at home with Eli and Will.  The kids enjoyed themselves, more than usual even.

However, they were determined not to show any trace of that enjoyment when I got out the camera.


I caught it eventually.


That earthquake table gets 'em every time.

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Listen Kalena, you NEVER need my permission to sleep more

Kalena woke up early from her nap today.  And by "early" I mean she slept for 20 minutes.  I wasn't looking forward to spending the afternoon managing meltdowns especially since that's what we did all morning.  But I went in anyway and found her lying in her crib, wailing away.  She didn't stop when she saw me or when I asked her if she wanted to get up.  In fact, it didn't really matter what I said, she just kept crying.  Finally I asked if she wanted to sleep some more to which she tearfully replied that she did.  I told her that she could, she just had to close her eyes and go back to sleep.  And then SHE DID.  She slept for another hour or so and when she got up again she was back to her cheerful self.  If only she would go back to sleep anytime *I* wanted her to.  Now that would be a good trick.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

I apologize if this isn't coherent

I have my annual Thanksgiving time cold right now.  It's pretty awesome (as always) and it was giving me an awesome headache earlier, so I dug around in our medicine drawer for something to take.  I found some Tylenol multi-symptom cold which seemed like it would fit the bill.  It's the nighttime stuff, but I took it anyway, figuring if I could make it through the inital wanting to fall asleep I'd be fine.  And, as it turns out, a toddler and a baby are pretty good incentive to tough out the wanting to fall asleep.  I did NOT count on the drowsiness getting worse as time went on.  I took the stuff like almost 3 hours ago and now I could probably fall asleep in this chair if I let myself.

Anyway, Kirsta and Joe and the boys got in to town today, so hopefully I'll have many cute pictures of the kids playing together.  Kalena was VERY excited for Patrick to get here and so far they've enjoyed each other's company lots.  We'll see how much they still enjoy each other after a week.

Friday, November 19, 2010

Reminiscing

I was looking through some pictures today and found this one.  I checked my archives and I don't think I posted this when I took it.  This is me last Thanksgiving.  Just 3 weeks before Will made his arrival.  


It doesn't seem like it was that long ago.  But now he's this serious little man.


Crazy.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Apple chargers-- they're nothing but trouble

So.  I love my Mac.  But these chargers are pretty much crap.  Brian had to replace his charger before he'd had his computer for a year.  Now I've had my Mac for a little over a year and the charger doesn't work any more.  At all.  We've both been using Brian's, but it's on its last legs.  It only works if you get it positioned just right and don't jiggle it or, you know, breath too close to it.

Remember back with the original nintendo where you had to get the game in just right or it wouldn't play?  That's this charger.  How is it that Apple can make such great computers and such crappy chargers?  Anyway.  The damn things cost $80 to replace.  I've been putting it off, but it's really starting to be a hassle.  I guess I know what I'll be spending some Christmas money on.

That's all.  I just wanted to whine about that.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

I'm going to try to distract you with pictures of Will

Brian is currently on his way home, he should be here in the next hour or so.  I MADE IT.  Barely.

Anyway, I am tired and also very distracted by Lie to Me on Netflix.  So instead of anything of substance you get pictures of the baby.  Remember when Will used to do The Lip?  Well, now he does The Lips.  Not when he's sad, he just crawls around like this all the time.  It's pretty awesome.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Randomish

Hey, 'member back when I made you all vote on Brian's hair?  And everybody voted for him to keep it short but he wanted to grow it out and since he doesn't listen to my blog readers (even though he should) he grew it out for awhile.  But then it got to that annoying too long and not long enough in-between stage (annoying to him, not me) and he couldn't stand it anymore so he cut it all off.  Not before I made him take a picture for posterity of course.  And by posterity I mean my blog.

Here's the long and crazy.  Brian thinks it was longer than the last time he grew it out, but it didn't seem as long to me.  (You:  DON'T CARE.)


I'm pretty sure I've already posted this, but it's the best one I have since he cut it.  


There you have it.  And now I'm going to go watch some TV before I pass out.  Anybody want to bring me some NoDoz so I can make it through tomorrow until Brian gets home?

Monday, November 15, 2010

blahhhhhh

Days like today make me realize just how much Brian does around here.  LOTS.  



They don't look like they'd be able to wear me down so completely in 13 hours do they?

Sunday, November 14, 2010

It makes me tired just thinking about it

Brian is going to Salt Lake City tomorrow for work and he won't be back until late Wednesday night.  I have plans for dinner at my parent's house at least two of the nights, but still, not so much looking forward to him being gone.

I should be getting things ready for him to be gone.  I should be putting things away, washing dishes, finishing the ironing, stuff that is exponentially harder to do when the kids are awake.  Instead I am watching Firefly on Netflix and blogging.  Because who wants to clean when the kids are sleeping and there's sci-fi to watch?  Hopefully we'll all survive the next few days.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Cousins and dinosaurs

Remember last year when Kari had her baby and I went to visit and Kirsta kept Kalena for a few days?  (You can read about it here and here.)  Well, back in August I returned the favor.  (Yes, this should have been posted a LONG time ago.)  After visiting Denver for Amelia's first birthday, Patrick came home with us for the week.  We had some fun at the house, but the highlight of the week was, of course, the dinosaur museum.  

Patrick was afraid before we even went in.  I shouldn't have been surprised considering how scared he was by the Butterfly Pavilion when Kirsta took him there.  Here he is hiding in the basket of the stroller. He told me it was "safe" down there.  Okay...


He looks indifferent in this picture.  What you can't see is how he is holding on to me for DEAR LIFE.  He squeezed tighter the closer I got to that T-Rex model.  


Kalena being excited about "digging" for dinosaur bones.  (She is wet from playing in the water table.)


Brian is showing the kids how to be scared by the earthquake table.  


Has anyone ever taken a good picture of three two year olds?


Patrick seemed to enjoy it after a bit.  He informed us all afterward the the "big dinosaur" was his favorite.  Anyway, it was a fun week.  And maybe when they're here over Thanksgiving Patrick will be able to enjoy the dinosaurs without thinking they're going to come alive and eat him.  Or maybe we'll just skip it.  

I feel like I post a lot about Dinosaur Journey, but it's probably the place we go most often.  Do your kids have a favorite outing?

Friday, November 12, 2010

Quick and jumbled

Well, this is gonna be quick because my laptop battery is dying and the power cord is all the way in the living room and Brian has a room full of people playing D&D out there.  (Yes, I am aware I'm married to a nerd.  I wouldn't have it any other way.)  So I will leave you with a picture of Miss showing you her "happy face."


And one of Buster shrieking with joy.


And now I'm going to get back to my hot chocolate and Friends DVD.  Aren't I exciting?  What fun things are you doing tonight?


Thursday, November 11, 2010

Top 5 ways to not lose weight

5)  Join Weight Watchers, but don't count points.  Pesky, pesky points.

4)  Pretend that nursing a child who eats PLENTY of solid food burns as many calories as nursing a baby who eats ZERO solids.  Same, right?

3)  Ignore exercise, doesn't washing dishes count?

2)  Macaroni & cheese for lunch every day.  Why make something else when I'm already making that for the kids?

1)  Three words: Ghiradelli. Brownie. Mix.

And now you know why my weight loss ticker hasn't moved.  I won't lie, I'm probably not going to make too much of an effort until after the new year.  As long as I don't gain any weight between now and then I'm good.

Now I think I hear those brownies calling to me from the kitchen...

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Christmas shopping in 5 easy steps

If you read Laura's comment on my last blog and are also wondering if I'm done with my Christmas shopping, the answer is, no, not exactly.  What I said was that I bought the last of the gifts I wanted to get for the KIDS.  I am done buying gifts for Kalena and Will.  However, I am also mostly done with the rest of my shopping.  I have 4 or 5 gifts left to get, and I know what I'll be getting for at least 3 of those.  This is my favorite part of Christmas shopping: waiting for the gifts to arrive.  I know you're dying to know, so here's my Christmas shopping method:

1) Decide what to get people.  This requires a list for some people, not for others.  Usually I only get a list from Brian.

2) Price shop.  Mostly online, although I did check ads while I was looking at toys for the kids.

3) Order stuff.  Or go to the store to pick it up, whichever is cheaper.  I usually find stuff online for less, but this year I found most of the kids stuff in store.

4) Wait for online orders to arrive.  This is my favorite part because I feel like I'm getting something done every time I get a new package, even though it's just the mail.

5) Wrap gifts.  Alright, this isn't really a shopping step, but you do have to do it.  I like to wait and wrap all my gifts at once when I'm in a wrapping mood.  Feels extra productive and you only have to get all that crap out one time.

How do you shop?

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

I'll just think of it as getting paid to go through all that crap

In all my cleaning/purging/organizing, there has been one place I've been diligently avoiding: our file cabinet.  While it was never especially organized, it became a black hole for unopened mail and random papers during our move.  Then it sat in storage for over a year where, believe it or not, it got even MORE disorganized.  Anytime we needed something we thought might be in there we shuffled through papers and stuffed them back in without any attempt at managing them.  We moved it out of storage and into our house and I've been trying not to think about the mess that was waiting for me in there.  But it's been bugging me lately, so today I decided to get to it.

The only saving grace is that it's just two drawers.  I don't even want to think about dealing with four drawers of this mess.  Anyway, I emptied it all onto the floor, mail, papers, paid bills, receipts.  I even found a coaster in a pair of scissors in there.  (I know, what?)  And then I started going through it, one paper at a time.  Trash, recyclable, file, shred, and crap that shouldn't have ever been in there.  And, as much as I felt like it was a waste of time to open all the mail, I did it.  If I haven't needed it for the last 16 months, why would I need it now, right?  But I opened it all anyway, mostly to make sure I wasn't just trashing stuff that needed to be shredded.  And THEN!  Then I opened one generic looking envelope and out fell a $25 gift card to Toys R Us!  A reward from my insurance company for participating in their "Healthy Pregnancy" program.  (Don't worry, the accompanying letter assured me that the $25 would be added to my taxable income as per IRS requirements.  Thanks so much, right?)  10 minutes later the $25 was spent at Toys R Us online on the last of the Christmas gifts I wanted to get for the kids.      Nothing like a little unexpected reward to make the work seem worth it.

If nothing else, this will guarantee I never throw away unopened mail.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Back to the dinosaur museum

We went to the dinosaur museum today, for the first time in awhile.  We haven't been going because of the nap schedule around here.  Winter hours at the museum (winter being October to May) are 10 am to 4 pm, and because it's actually in Fruita, it's about a 20 minute drive from here.  SO.  A museum trip means I need to leave the house by 3 or it's not worth going.  Usually the day goes like this: up at 6 ish (both kids), Will goes down for his first nap around 9, and sleeps until 11 or 11:30.  Once he's up it's almost lunch time, then after lunch Kalena goes down for her nap, usually about 1 pm.  Will has his second nap between 1:30 and 2 and by the time both kids are up it's generally close to 3 (sometimes later.)  Which means no way are we getting out of the house by 3.  Which means no dinosaurs.

But today!  Today I thought, daylight savings means the schedules are off, I'll let them nap early and we'll go to the museum this afternoon.  Kalena was excited, Will was excited (alright fine, Will has no idea what's going on) and we were ready to go.  I just needed to stop for a minute at my parent's house on the way.  When we turned the corner into their neighborhood, oh MAN.  You would have thought I told Kalena that instead of seeing the dinosaurs she was going to be tortured for the rest of the afternoon.  She just WAILED.  Despite my reassurance that we were just stopping for a minute, that she didn't even have to get out of the car.  She wasn't happy until we were leaving the house, back on the way to her beloved dinosaurs.

I guess I need to do those errands on the way home from the dinosaurs.  WHOOPS.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

First photo of the teeth

I think I mentioned that Will is getting four teeth.  Interestingly, the four he's getting in are the two middle bottom ones and his top two lateral incisors.  (Yeah, I had to look that up.)  So he's not getting his two front teeth, he's getting the ones on either side.  It makes him look like a little vampire whenever he opens his mouth enough to see the top two.  They're like little fangs.  I tried to get a picture of ALL the teeth, but the best I could get was the bottom two.


Hopefully now that they've all broken through he'll get back to sleeping better again.




Saturday, November 6, 2010

Feeling old

I have a hard time getting rid of books.  Even books I don't like.  Even textbooks.  Or, maybe especially textbooks since they're so ridiculously expensive.  (I couldn't sell mine back to the school bookstore because I usually ordered paperback versions from Amazon.)  But, as we get settled in here I've been in purging mode.

I used to be very, um, let's say sentimental, about stuff.  I didn't like to throw things away, even if it wasn't something I used often.  Or ever.  Then one day I woke up and I wanted to get rid of stuff.  I wanted to sort and clear out and throw away and donate.  I wanted stuff GONE.  I have no idea why they change in attitude, but there it is.  This happened not too long before I was laid off, so while I got some sorting done, and we threw out quite a bit of stuff before we moved, there was still lots of stuff we needed to go through.  And what better time than while I'm unpacking?  Well, recently I made it to our boxes of textbooks.

I will be keeping a few (ones I have referenced from time to time) and getting rid of the others.  Most of them I haven't used since I took the class (and since I started the college in 2001, that's been awhile...)  In fact, some of them are so old I found DISKS that went with them.  Not CDs, actual disks.  Nothing like realizing the technology I used in college is COMPLETELY outdated to make me feel old.  Definitely want to throw that stuff away.  Anything making you feel old today?

Friday, November 5, 2010

How we got the baby to sleep through the night

The short version: by using a comfort object.

Oh, you wanted more detail than that?  Fine.

So, at 9 months I was worried that Will wasn't sleeping enough.  I wasn't so much concerned by the not sleeping through the night (I really think kids will sleep through the night whey they are ready.)  But in addition to not sleeping through the night, he was going to bed late (around 10 most nights) and getting up early (between 6:30 and 7) and only napping for 45 minutes twice during the day.  I discussed with his pediatrician and she agreed, not enough sleep.  We discussed the various theories on sleep and agreed that it depends on temperament of both parent and child.  (Most helpful discussion ever right?)

In the end what she recommended doing was getting him a comfort object.  We settled on a teddy bear and started giving it to him every time he nursed or we put him to bed.  I also co-slept with him and the bear for a week or so.  Then we moved, and started putting him to bed at 7.  He cried some for the first few days (10 minutes or so) but it got better after that.  For awhile I worried that he was going to cry every night when we put him down because he got so used to The Routine that he would start to cry as soon as he was done nursing.  But he got over that, and now he goes to bed without a fuss most nights.

It is true that sleep begets sleep.  Going to bed earlier led to sleeping through the night (after a few days) AND better naps. He has been waking once in the night recently, but I blame the FOUR teeth that erupted in the last 2 weeks.

So there you have it.  Questions?

Thursday, November 4, 2010

The perks of having two

Nothing makes me smile quite like finding my kids playing happily.  Together.



Kalena likes to pat Will on the head and tell him, "It o-tay bay-bee."


Obviously they don't always get along so well, but it's a beautiful thing when they do.




Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Normally I'm more on top of things

Confession: I didn't vote yesterday.  I'll wait while you pick your jaw up off the floor.  Done?  Okay.

It's not that I don't care, although, it seems that voting these days is mostly a matter of picking which person or policy I hate the least.  The truth is, I'm not registered to vote in Colorado.  That's right, we've been back in Colorado for almost 16 months but I'm still registered to vote in Texas.  WHOOPS.  And maybe I would have been more motivated to GET registered as election time approached if that weren't just the BEST excuse to not deal with people wanting me to take pamphlets or sign petitions and such.

Anyway, I'm sure I'll be registered by the next election.  Maybe before then I'll also get around to ordering Will's official birth certificate.  Oh yeah, still haven't done that either.  Apparently I'm a bad citizen AND a bad mother.  What a day.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Back in the technology dark ages

Remember when I told you I got an iPhone?  (Back in this post.)  Well, I did get one, or rather my brother in law Jonathan was nice enough to give me his old one when he got a new one.  ANYWAY.  While I would love to actually use it as a phone, moving into a house meant cutting back expenses which meant no new iPhone calling plan.  So, it's essentially the same thing as having an iPod touch, which is also pretty awesome.  As a side note, if you're interested in winning at Words With Friends, my user name is Elsha3 and I'm on a losing streak right now.

Back to the point.  Cutting back on bills also meant cutting Brian's iPhone from our plan.  We planned on cutting back to one line and getting me a new phone since mine was getting pretty glitchy.  But when I went to do that I found out Brian's 2 year contract on his iPhone wasn't up yet.  There was only a month left on it, so we figured we'd just wait the month instead of paying the early termination fee.  Well, the month is up tomorrow and not a minute too soon, because this morning the screen on my phone died.  Interestingly enough, the *phone* part of my phone works fine.  I can make and receive calls, but that's all.  I can't see who's calling, or get voicemail or text messages (kinda hard to read a text with no screen), I can't see missed calls, I can't look up numbers.  It's a little weird.

But you know what the crazy part is?  This is how all phones USED to be.  Remember that?  Back in the day when your phone was attached to your wall and had a cord and when it rang you answered it with NO IDEA who was on the other end?  And if someone called and you weren't home you couldn't tell they called?  (For those of you who are wondering, yes, I am old enough to remember a time when our home had no answering machine.)  And when you dialed a number it didn't pop up on a screen anywhere for you to double check that you'd dialed correctly?  Well, I know it felt normal then, but let me tell you, it sure feels weird now!  Anyway, if you call me in the next couple days and I don't answer, be sure to call me again later because otherwise I'll NEVER KNOW.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Third year in a row

It's November (already, not sure how that happened) which means-- NaBloPoMo again!



This is where I pretend like I have readers who actually want me to post every day.  (Besides my sister Kari, who actually DOES want me to post every day.)  I know you're all thrilled.

I feel a little unprepared this time around, the last two years I've done it I've had a list of topics I knew I wanted to post about.  This year I have like one.  Well, I'm sure I'll find something from this thrilling life that I lead.  BE READY!